In a new blog post, Katherine Heigl opens up about what it's like to be an actress and a mother and how difficult it is to balance her career and her daughter, Naleigh.
Katherine's honesty is refreshing, considering many actresses fail to truly admit how motherhood takes a huge toll on their Hollywood careers.
“I have always known I wanted to be a mother,” the One for the Money
star tells iVillage
in a blog post. “There was just something about the weight of a child in my arms — their soft cooing, their sweet milky smell, their giggles and even their tears. I loved that I could soothe them, comfort them, play with them and I loved that they needed me on some very basic level."
"I have also always known I wanted to be an actress,” Katherine adds. “From the moment I walked onto my first set when I was 11 years old, I knew I had found my passion. I loved everything about making movies: the wardrobe that made the character come alive in me; the hair and makeup that could transform me; the cast and crew that became like a family for those few short months; and the craft service where there was never a shortage of sodas and Slim Jims."
But, after finally becoming a mother, Katherine realized "that having it all would not look and feel as I imagined."
"I knew, of course, as I prepared to welcome my daughter into my life that it would be a bit of a juggling act but I had no doubt that I could do it.," she writes. "I went into it full throttle, ready to buckle down and make it all work seamlessly as I always imagined I could. The thing is I couldn’t. “
Katherine goes on to say that sacrificing her career to care for Naleigh, whom she adopted in 2009
with husband Josh Kelley
, was the most difficult thing she’s ever done. But she adds that giving up precious time with her daughter to shoot movies was just as difficult.
“No matter how great my intentions, how lofty my goals, how passionate my commitment, I was failing. I was failing my work, I was failing my daughter, I was failing my husband,” she explains. “I couldn’t help but wonder what I had gotten myself into and if the choice I made to be a working mother was the most selfish decision of my life."
“I asked myself what was wrong with me. How can I want to leave my child to go back to work? How can I miss all those important little moments with her to do nothing more significant then make a movie? The simple truth is that I love my daughter passionately and as most mothers do, think she is the smartest, funniest, prettiest child in the whole world — but she cannot fulfill everything in me.”
Read the rest of Katherine's blog at iVillage
and let us know what you think of her story.