If good ol' Ebenezer rolled up into 2012, we're fully convinced he would live in a loft with two other dudes and a quirky girl. And occasionally be forced to drop money into the "douche-bag jar."
- We were on very strict instructions from Rabbi Shmuley not to say a word until the last Christian kid found out about Santa Claus. Ruining Christmas? Very bad for our brand.
- I'm stuck here at this lesbian cookie party. It's all wreaths, no trees.
- I don’t celebrate Christmas. Or as I like to call it, white Anglo-Saxon winter privilege night.
- Love is stupid. It is a lie. So, bah humbug to you, Cecelia. Bah humbug! Baaaaahhh! Humbug!
- Black Santa Claus? I am so sick of hanging out with Christians. This is my last Christian Christmas.