Oh, Britney. Britney, Britney, Britney. Britney Jean Spears, we think you’re great. The way you’ve bounced back from head-shaving episodes, custody battles, and a tendency to drive around in circles until the wee hours of the morning is so admirable, and we’re very proud of you. It’s this love we have for you that prompts our ardent plea: Get your weave fixed.
Brit, you’re pretty, you’ve got your head on straight now, you’re going to be on Glee next week — in short, you’re a big success and we couldn’t be happier for you. But the way you showed up yesterday, heading to lunch in Calabasas, Calif. with that… well, hair (?) attached to your head, it’s just not befitting a woman of your station.
With other stars, we don’t care how tangled and plastic-like their hair appears, but with you, we just want all the best in your life and career, and that includes your coiffure. So call that hair stylist, stat!