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MONDAY: DATING

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Dec. 10 2007, Published 11:03 a.m. ET

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Although I do want to get married someday, and believe that I will, I’m not willing to settle for anything less than fairy tale, butterflies in your stomach kind of love that lasts forever. No one in my family has ever been divorced and I don’t want to be the first.

Another reason not to settle, forever is a long, long time!

That said, I had dinner with the parents, grandparents, aunt etc. this weekend and sitting around the dinner table I was reminded that I’m not married and as much as they’d like to see me settled, they don’t want me to settle.

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During said dinner I got a text from M, “I’d really like to see you, when can I see you?” I went to college with M. For a short time we worked at the same bar where I was a cocktail waitress, he was a bartender and we had a mild flirtation. Then he started dating one of our co-workers. Once we stopped working at the bar we lost touch, que serea sera…

Until he called me out of the blue a couple of years ago, nearly five years after we worked in the bar together, to tell me I’m the one who got away. Really? Got away from what? I don’t remember ever giving him much more than a bar order and the odd ride home when he drank too much. He’d since moved from AZ (where we went to school) back to the east coast  (although a six hour train ride from NYC) and said he wanted to come and see me. After several cancelled trips he finally came to NYC about this time last year and after one fun, getting platonically reacquainted night on the town, he told me, ‘You’re amazing, if you ever want to get married, just let me know.” Although we didn’t as much as kiss that weekend, he kept repeating the offer – and he was serious! He even spent his last of three days here looking into a transfer! To make a long story short it’s around the holidays again and his texts have resumed. I wonder, do single men who have allusions of wanting to be married one day have some kind of clock that makes them panic at a certain age? Kind of like the maternal clock woman are said to possess? Is it enough to talk yourself into believing a girl who looks good on paper is the one you want to see waking up on the pillow next to you for the rest of your life? I’m flattered, but…;) xo

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