Simon Says

Mar. 7 2008, Published 3:16 p.m. ET

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What exactly have the girls done to Simon Cowell? For the second week in a row he showered the guys with compliments, then savaged the ladies.

The boys didn't come away entirely unscathed, though, especially Danny Noriega. Simon didn''t pull any punches when he tore into Danny's “Tainted Love” effort. "Purple hair or not, I thought it was horrible. Absolutely useless," he scoffed. "I hated the arrangement, hated the performance, hated the vocals, I didn't like anything about it."

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But take solace, Danny. There was a rare swipe at David Archuleta, too. Strangely, although the 17-year-old is famous for his nonstop grin, Simon thinks he needs to cheer up a bit. "It wasn't as good as last week," he moaned. "It is all getting a little bit gloomy here. You don't have to keep singing sad songs. I just think that you need to lighten up a little bit. We have to see a fun side occasionally or this is going to get depressing."


Meanwhile, his assessment of Luke Menard's chances in the competition was so blunt it should have come with a spoiler warning: "I've got to tell you there is no chance you are going to make it through to the final 12."

Simon's mood got worse overnight, though, and he was back to his usual venomous self by the time it was the girls turn. He dismissed Asia'h Epperson as no better than a "second-rate Whitney" before telling Kady Malloy that she suffers from a "massive lack of personality" and "I can't get anything out of you. You've got no emotion. You may be in trouble."

He thinks the end is nigh for Kristy Lee Cook, too. "Best I can see you coming in tenth," he said. "Your problem is that you're forgettable. You're going to battle with bigger voices, personalities."

Ramiele Malubay got lit up again this week for her rendition of “Against All Odds” "I thought it was old-fashioned," he said. "Didn't hear the big money note. It was a bit predictable, and I'm not jumping out of my chair." Looks like the odds may not be in her favor.


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