13 Things We Learned from Last Night's 'Real Housewives of New Jersey'
Caroline Manzo continued to play peacemaker in episode two of the Real Housewives of New Jersey, but this time her soothing skills weren't so effective. What did we learn this week?
Watch: Caroline and Teresa made peace enough to sit on our couch and chat with OKMagazine.com!
The Gorga patriarch is in poor health.
Later in the episode, Caroline spells it out directly to Teresa—don't let your father die without seeing his two children back together. Painful but necessary to hear.
Melissa and Joe Gorga are really serious about selling their house.
In the reunion last year, Melissa explained that she wanted to move so that her children would no longer be attending school alongside Teresa's children. It turns out that wasn't just something she said to be mean—it's really happening.
Caroline Manzo takes in stragglers.
She explains that over the years, she has opened her homes for castmates Jacqueline Laurita and her family, and her sister Dina Manzo and her daughter. She is now living with yet another sister, who looks just like her. She reminds us in this episode that she is one of 11 siblings. I'd like to meet them all.
Joseph Wakile has grown up so much!
Like Gia, little Joseph has majorly grown up between seasons, and now he's learning to drive. We were treated to the age-old tradition of parents nervously teaching their kids to drive.
Jacqueline is speaking out about dealing with her son's autism.
We saw her tearfully speaking to a parenting magazine about her son Nicholas' autism diagnosis.
Chris Laurita is NOT using Viagra.
After a wonderfully amusing chat with Joe Gorga about Joe's favorite topic, we learn that Chris and Jacqueline's sex life is going just fine. Okay, fabulous. Moving on.
Watch: Teresa showed us just how many lip glosses are in her purse (hint: a lot!).
Lauren Manzo does her mother's makeup before she goes out.
It turns out it is really handy to have a makeup artist in the family. Where do we sign up?
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Teresa has a theory for how Melissa nabbed Joe Gorga.
It involves dubious Italian folklore and red wine and menstrual blood and I can't recount this any further because this is a family website. Let's just say it is nonsensical and highly icky.
Parts of the Gorgas' house break off when you touch them.
A few prospective buyers stop by to check out the house, and are alarmed when first part of the faucet breaks off, then the "marble" on the sink crumbles away to leave a wooden base. Whoops. Joe Gorga doesn't deny it.
We really need Dina Manzo back.
That is all. She sneaks back into conversation regularly, and we have never stopped missing her. What's happening, Dina!
Chris Laurita is seriously the best husband ever.
Not only are he and Jacqueline keeping the spark alive in the bedroom, as noted, but he's also supportive and prioritizes their relationship above anything else. He spent time coaching Nicholas to say 'I love you' again, a struggle given his speech issues.
The Teresa-Caroline chat doesn't really bring us anything new.
It was mostly rehashing the same old issues, which unfortunately seem like they'll never be fixed.
Nicholas can successfully say 'I love you.'
So. Many. Tears. Cried. This was one of the most amazing moments of the series.
What was your favorite moment from last night's episode? Did you cry when Nicholas said those three words? Do you think that Teresa and Melissa will ever be able to patch things up? Tell us in the comments below or tweet us @OKMagazine.