Funday Sunday

May 4 2009, Published 7:26 a.m. ET

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Yay! I finished my first 10K today in 1 hour and 2 minutes. More importantly, I had a lot of fun doing it. If you set your mind to something, you really can accomplish almost anything.

Afterwards a group of predominately female friends and I met for margaritas by the beach in Santa Monica where one of the token men at the table read out loud an email he was sent from a friend of his, who he said is 'an extremely good-looking hedge fund guy' who tried out J-Date. As he read I learned that, despite Jewish guilt from the fam, I'm not alone in not being able to wrap my head around online dating (although I see how it can be beneficial for others). Nonetheless, we found said good looking LA guy's telling of his experiece very entertaining. Hope you do as well ;) xo

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Under a lot of recent pressure from both Mom and Bubbe, I buckled and joined J-Date. I signed on late a couple Fridays ago, posted a pic and a little bit about myself, went to bed,and awoke not five hours later to find tens of messages in my inbox,"flirts" that were sent to me, and that I'd been added to numerous "hot lists". I'll admit that I was a tiny bit excited.

In the morning, within seconds of signing on, I received a chat request from a girl whose username is "IGotWhatJewNeed". I was able to look in my history and find that she had been trying to communicate with me virtually all night, had sent several messages, flirts, hot lists, and whatever other gimmicks this site contains. She didn't look too cute, but I accepted anyway. It started out with the usual "Hey", "Hey", "How are you?", "I'm ok, what about you?" etc. She then asked if I was a "full-blown Jew" to which I responded, "Why don't you come over and make me one?" She told me I'm gross and left the chat. So that was J-Date experience #1.

I've since received numerous messages from random girls, usually with curly, dark hair and "average/medium" builds (that's J-code for "if I were to sit on you, it would not feel good").

Some of these messages come in the form of a "Flirt" and are accompanied by the generic "I'm intrigued, feel free to email me". Others write personal messages, often times trying to play off something they read in your profile. Here are a few examples:

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"What's up? I'm new to the site and just wanted to say hi. Talk to you soon!" (no you won't).

"I was going to send a flirt but they are all so cheesy i couldn't bear it.

It sounds like you like the outdoors and to be active as much as me. i just went swimming with dolphins, in miami, in the wild which has made my week. In NYC today for a while....drop me a line if you're around and feel like frisbee in central park sometime." (no chance...).

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"Aside from the fact that your grammar is great (an admittedly, totally nerdy plus for me), your smile is adorable!" (your grammar is also great, but unfortunately your smile makes me want to hide in a cave)

I also received a message from "PeterB7314" but did not open it.

I have yet to go on a "J-date". There's one girl who messaged me and seemed cool. We corresponded back and forth a few times. I told her I'm really busy and warned her in advance that I often have to cancel plans, and she responded, "Do you always talk to women like that? Maybe that's why you're still single! No problem, not sure this is going to work..take care, Kimi" (Btw, a few days later, I received an email from her saying " are you?"

Anyway, I was about to give up on the site before I came upon a very cute girl. She told me to Facebook her and that we'd correspond that way. So that you can understand how I felt upon viewing her profile,there two pics, one from J-Date and the other found on her Facebook page . My lawyer thinks we should sue for false advertisement.

*Conclusion*J-Date: Not the Move


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