I bailed on my longstanding plans to go on John Mayer’s Mayercraft Carrier 2 Carnival cruise ship to Cabo for a host of reasons (one being three plus days on a floating city populated with frenzied screaming John Mayer fans may have prompted me to jump ship and test how far I could swim before reaching fan-free shores),  another being claustrophobic by the idea of staying in a windowless interior cabin and there were just so many options here in LA this weekend (Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards are about to begin, Perez Hilton’s birthday party with extra special ‘surprise guests,’ and the Red Cross’s Red Tie Gala in Santa Monica where the cast of "The Doctors," featuring former doctor bachelor Travis Stork, will be attending). So much to do, so little time, but my issues aside..

I was fortunate enough to attend Vh1 Save the Music’s “One Splendid Evening,” the pre-party on the Mayership before it set sail – and discuss with John Mayer some of his issues.

The first thing I wanted to address (since anything Aniston was off-limits) was his Twittering obsession. John feigned surprise by the interest in his Tweets and Twittering habits although he ( in close competition with Ashton Kutcher), is the one of the most prolific celebrity Twitterers and his tweets (except for when they slip to so inane they’re not even in English) often give people something to talk about, if not think too deeply about.

So, on the subject of Twittering John (who said he was Twittering with his hands in his pocket while we were speaking) told me, “Twitter is silly,  it’s dumb, it’s dumb fun.” He explained, “You get 140 characters so you can’t carry on too long. You sort of go wrong if you break it into two Twitters, it’s like a Twitter taboo, it’s just silly. Every time I get like, another 100,000 followers, I get two thoughts, my first thought is ‘Oh, I should probably take this more seriously,’ and the next it’s like, ‘Nope, poopy time, it’s time to just be really silly.’” And, he added, “You know what? I don’t care if Al Gore starts following me, I’m going to just write really dumb stuff. Yesterday I twittered in Dutch. Who cares? You’ve got to make sure you don’t take anything too seriously, especially Twitter. Really.”

Since some of Mayer’s Twitters actually do sound to me like he’s trying for an element of serious, I think he was only be half-hearted when he said he Only tries to be silly, and his half-heartedness was relayed later in the evening during a private concert in a theater on the ship.

After a line-up that included Guster (told you guys I’d mention you), Erin McCarley (she’s adorable), OAR (great, multi-talented guys, love them), Gavin Rossdale (so cool), Sara Bareilles (the only person involved who thought she was too good to speak to all the press on the red carpet), Jordan Sparks (such an amazing woman and talent), John Mayer debuted a new song called “Half of My Heart.”

Here are some of the lyrics (very incomplete) I was able to get down from the song. Draw your own conclusions:

Half of my heart isn’t able to love.
I made a plan that a man can only love himself.
Lonely is the song I sang until the day you came.
Half of my heart has a grip on the situation.
Half of my heart says I can’t keep loving you.
"Half of my heart is a shotgun wedding to a bride with a newspaper ring
Half of my heart is the part of a man who knows he’s never really loved a thing."
Later on you’ll see that I never gave more than half of my heart,
But I can’t stop loving you with half of my heart.
Half of my heart has half a mind to tell you that
Half of my heart just won’t do.

In other Mayer cruise-related news, I asked John if he feels pressure to trump the mankini he sported on last year’s voyage and he said, “I feel a lot of pressure. I tried this thing on last night, I had a fitting, and let me tell you, I felt pressure all over my lower region. I waddle in this thing, it’s amazing. But, it’s for the fans.” He added, “This year I’m going white and it’s a little bit like Stewart Copland from The Police 1979, like Rio de Janeiro. It’s like if I was hanging out in 1978 making my record, this is what I’d be wearing. It’s a little bit more rock & roll this time, but let me tell you, it’s balls out. I have to really control my thoughts when I’m wearing it or things could get out of hand.”

Ok. This blog is getting rather lengthy, but I’ll be back with more sprinklings of Mayerisms and bits from chats I had with Jordan Sparks and Gavin Rossdale. Happy Saturday 😉 Xo

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