Ice-T didn’t get a reality show because he loves hair and makeup, that’s for sure.

The rapper-actor, 53, opens up about why he prefers a woman with a speedy get-ready routine, as wife Coco, 32, fields phone calls in the bedroom of their suite at Mount Airy Casino Resort in Mount Pocono, Pennsylvania.

Ice divides women into two categories: those who take care of themselves, and those who don’t.

“It’s all the details – it’s not clothes,” he tells me. “Women dress for other women; they don’t dress for guys. There’s never been a guy who says ‘I would’ve slept with her, but she had last month’s Gucci bag. Oh my God, she had spring Dior mules on, I don’t want to be with her.’ We don’t register any of those things. You guys are doing that for each other. Men look at a woman like ‘she takes care of herself.’ Because if a woman looks like she takes care of herself, then that makes us believe that she’ll probably take care of business. She can hold things together.”

He adds, “If you see a chick and she’s all over the place, you’re like ‘this sloppy-a** chick, I’m not letting her in my house, she’s going to slop-up my s***.’ We like to see that, but one thing about a woman, I think as a beauty, you have to make it look effortless, and that’s a trick. You’ve gotta make it look effortless, because guys aren’t into all this maintenance becoming a problem.”

He puts it into practice in his life.

“When me and Coco got together, we had a 20 minute rule, which was from the moment I said ‘we’ve gotta hit the door,’ you’ve got 20 minutes,” he tells me. “Now if she knew that she had to get a lot more together, she’d ask for a pre-call, like ‘yo, I know,’ but we’ve gotta hit the ground moving. In my business, your wife won’t get left at home because you want to leave her at home, but you have hard numbers you have to hit. You have to be there at 8. You can’t be like ‘I’m waiting on my wife.’ The TV show doesn’t care; the movie doesn’t care. You can’t be a liability.”

He urges women to learn how to get ready quicker.

“If your man can roll out of bed, hit it with some Ivory soap, buff it up, wash his face off and stuff like that, you should be able to do it in at least three times that. I understand that ya’ll need a little bit more, but you don’t want me to say ‘well, I’m better than you because I can get ready quicker.’ [laughs] What’s really the deal?!”

He feels that less can be more.

“I think women need to know how to get their regimen together, because if it takes her two hours to look like that, how much construction is going on? How much fake is that?’ A real beautiful woman should be able to jump up, run her fingers through her hair, wipe her skin off and hit it with a little lip gloss and hit the door – if she’s truly beautiful. When you’re telling me you need an hour-and-a-half, I wonder ‘what f******* game are you playing with me?’ [laughs]”

Here’s my pic with Ice-T:

Catch Ice-T and Coco on their E! reality show, Ice Loves Coco, which airs Sundays at 10:30/9:30 c.

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