NEWSErika Kirk Reveals Usha Vance's Advice After Charlie's Death: 'Just Get Through the Next 15 Minutes'
Erika credited Usha for the valuable advice she gave her following Charlie's assassination.
Sept. 9 2026, Published 11:51 a.m. ET
Erika Kirk revealed the advice Usha Vance gave her after Charlie Kirk's death, recalling the words that helped her cope during the first days of grief.
"Just get through the next 15 minutes," Usha told Erika, who recalled the conversation in a guest essay for the New York Post published on September 7.
Usha Compared Grief to a Difficult Flight
Usha had comforting words for Erika, telling her to focus on getting through the next 15 minutes.
Erika recalled telling Usha that she did not know how she would move forward after losing her husband.
The second lady responded with an analogy involving a flight with young children.
"You know when you're on an airplane with your kids, and you're going to land in 15 minutes, but the kids are going crazy, screaming, throwing things, and then the plane lands, and the kids relax, and everything is fine again?" Usha told her. "That's how it will be. Just get through the next 15 minutes."
Erika wrote that Usha's advice had a profound effect on her. "Her words are seared into my heart," she said.
Erika Is Reminded of Her Husband Daily
Erika is reminded of her late husband daily.
After returning home, Erika encountered reminders of Charlie throughout the house.
She described standing in their bedroom and looking at his pillow, then wondering "how long a person's scent can last in sheets."
Erika eventually turned off the light and crawled into bed with her 3-year-old daughter.
"Just get through the next 15 minutes," she repeated.
"For months, I avoided my bedroom," Erika wrote in the essay, which was titled "What I've Learned About Grief."
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Grief Continues Through Family Milestones
Erika had to navigate family milestones without her husband.
Erika said the months after Charlie's death brought a series of milestones she had once expected to experience with him.
She remembered his 32nd birthday, her own birthday, Thanksgiving and Christmas. Putting up the family's Christmas tree also gave her a new perspective on life after losing her husband.
"Being a widow means old traditions will need to make room for new ones," she wrote.
Erika also watched her young daughter experience the loss, describing her as "surviving her own little crashing waves."
"At first, I needed to survive the next 15 minutes. Over time, I've realized that Charlie would want me to live them," Erika wrote.
She Has Learned to Reconcile Grief With Joy
Erika encouraged people facing hard times to follow Usha's advice.
Erika wrote about reconciling grief with the life she continues to share with their children.
"I can miss him with every part of me and still laugh with our children. I can have a broken heart and still experience joy," she wrote.
She has encouraging words for people going through difficult days.
"If you are living through grief, I won't tell you what to feel or that tomorrow will be better than today," she wrote. "I will tell you what a dear friend told me: Just get through the next 15 minutes."
Charlie was fatally shot on September 10, 2025, while speaking at Utah Valley University. He was 31. Following his death, Erika took over leadership of Turning Point USA, the conservative organization Charlie founded.
