COUPLESMichelle Obama Reveals Why She 'Couldn't Stand' Husband Barack Obama When Her Kids Were Young
Michelle Obama is getting real about the work that needs to be put into marriage.
The former First Lady opened up on the difficulties of balancing partnership and parenthood — especially in the early years — admitting there were times she wasn't that big of a fan of her husband, Barack Obama.
"People think I'm being catty when I'm saying this. It's like, there were 10 years where I couldn't stand my husband," she explained in a viral TikTok interview. "And guess when it happened? When those kids were little. Right?"
"You can be all great individually when you're just married. You got your life, he's got his, you come together, it's all, 'ooh, good to see you, bye. Take it easy,'" she joked. "But the minute we had kids, it's like, 'where you going?' and 'how far?'"
Michelle admitted that when children — she shares 24-year-old Malia and 21-year-old Sasha with the former president — are very young is when many couples start questioning each other on the balance of parental duties, like changing diapers.
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"That's when all the measuring starts because you like got this project, and guess what? Little kids, they're terrorists," she added. "They are. They have demands. They don't talk, they're poor communicators, they cry all the time, they're irrational ... and you love them more than anything. And so you can't blame them ... so you turn that ire on each other."
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Michelle later revealed that for roughly ten years, while they were working on building their careers and worrying about who was doing what with the kids, she struggled with feeling that the division of labor wasn't "even."
"Marriage isn't 50/50 ever. Ever. There's times I'm 70, he's 30. There's times he's 60/40," she noted. "But guess what? 10 years...we've been married 30. I would take 10 bad years over 30. It's just how you look at it."
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She added that feelings in a marriage are bound to "change over time" and the minute the honeymoon period is over, people often want to immediately give up because it no longer feels the same.
"But now you're in the work," she said. "That's why I want to talk about the work of it, the work of any relationship, the work of friendship."
