So much for a milestone.
Sister Wives stars Kody and Meri Brown celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary during the Sunday, April 4, episode of the reality show. Rather than flowers and gifts, the duo exchanged awkward words with one another about their relationship.
"Here we are, celebrating our non-anniversary because we’re not a couple, but we’re a family,” Meri said to Kody while in the car together. “You and I have not been out together since last year’s anniversary, which is fine. It is it what it is."
In response, Kody — who wed Meri in 1990 — asked his first wife if their relationship status was "troubling" to her, revealing in a confessional that he's trying to figure out if Meri "has a spark" for him or is just "lonely."
"I think we miss the idea of us. We don’t miss each other,” the father-of-18 added, to which Meri replied: "Speak for yourself." She then confessed that she still cares for him but knows the feelings aren't reciprocated.
"I do have a strong draw to you, but I do not act on that because I know how you feel," she admitted to Kody. "I can’t make you care for me. I can’t change that."
During their car ride convo, Kody told Meri, 50, she doesn't try to "court" him, while noting that he doesn't try to pursue her either. “I’m just as guilty, but I’m not missing this relationship,” he candidly stated. “You have not made an effort in this and you’re the one that wants it. There’s a lack of real interest.”
Meri tearfully told her estranged hubby how much she constantly craves love from him. “Not on my part," she said of who is showing who a lack of interest. "Do you know that every time you put your hand on my hand, how I feel? I wish you knew.”
During Kody's confessionals, he opened up more about the couple's troublesome relationship over the years, explaining that he's been "looking for a spark — something to initiate some form of desire for a relationship," however, "it has never manifested."
Kody, 52, also credited Meri's infamous 2015 catfishing scandal (she had an emotional affair with someone who she thought was a man but turned out to be a female admirer) as one of the factors that worsened the couple's marriage. The two tried to reconcile through therapy, but Kody later confessed that he had no desire to be intimate with Meri.
He further admitted that he's struggling to figure out how to make his marriage with Meri work. While she "wants to be loved romantically," Kody told cameras: "there has to be a spark" in order for romance to exist. "From that, she will receive romance, love, a full marriage and a sexual relationship."
According to Kody, the couple's talk in the car wasn't about wanting a divorce from Meri, as his faith and conscious "doesn't allow" him to divorce. Kody managed to move on from Meri's online affair, but the pair remain at a stand still in their unhappy marriage — and Kody doesn't know what to do next, he explained.
"I’m finally out of the anger phase, I’m finally out of the bitterness now how are we gonna do this right?" he said, noting that it's hard to resolve the couple's issues when all Meri wants is to be loved.
"Well, be lovable," Kody harshly told cameras of his thoughts on Meri's simplistic request.
Luckily, the two ended up enjoying a nice evening together on their milestone anniversary, having dinner outside on a blanket. However, after Meri said she wanted to kiss him, Kody made it clear that he was not interested, leaving Meri to feel rejected.
“Romance and sex are saved in my world for people who are in love," he said of the incident in an interview.
Moving past the awkward exchange, Kody confessed to Meri that he isn't satisfied with another one of his marriages, though he didn't specify which one (he's also married to Christine, Janelle and Robyn). Kody concluded his rant on all of his marriages by finally stating: "Nobody is stuck with me and they can all leave.”
Sister Wives airs on TLC Sundays at 10 p.m. ET.