'I Felt Like a Robot': Britney Spears Opens Up on Conservatorship Damage While Flaunting Lingerie Look

Britney Spears is reflecting on the lasting impact of her 13-year conservatorship while giving fans a glimpse at a sultry new look.

The “Sometimes” singer opened up about her experience in an Instagram post featuring a clip of herself wearing black lingerie. Five years after gaining freedom from the legal arrangement that placed her father, Jamie Spears, in control of many aspects of her life, Britney reflected on how the experience left her feeling like a “robot,” saying she still feels the effects of what she went through.

Alongside the video, Britney shared an emotional message.

“I actually miss the way I respected people so much that there was a genuine mystery of acute oneness when we were together, which was sacred,” she began in the post’s caption. “I feel like, still to this day, people don’t realize the real damage that was done to my heart and soul in the conservatorship.”

Britney then reflected on how she viewed herself as a performer and how that changed as she got older.

“But it’s bizarre. I was painfully shy, but I got to be someone different on stage. After having kids, though, I think that game was beyond overdone. I felt so silly and embarrassed,” she explained. “I think it’s easier when you’re younger to go there. Anyways, this video is actually crazy ’cause it’s identical to the ‘Gimme More’ video, but done with a version of me with 6-year-old legs and looking way younger.”

The pop star also opened up about her relationship with her own image and how she believes she looks different in paparazzi photos compared with real life.

“Crazy. I’ve been single for so long, and I haven’t really shown my body except one time in my green bathing suit. You can see here I’m actually extremely short. For some reason in paparazzi pics and in my living room, I seem to have very long legs. Maybe an illusion… the front of my house is the show stage!!!!! Yet backstage I look quite a bit different,” she wrote.

In another post, Britney also opened up about the struggles she faced at the height of her fame.

“I honestly can’t believe I used to be able to perform in front of so many people,” she wrote, wearing the same underwear. “I would get asthma and start shaking if I had to meet more than 10 people in a meet and greet. She could see in my eyes how scared I would get. My dad had me meeting 70 people, I think, during that time. I lost the sensitivity of my soul. And it literally hurt. I felt like a robot.”

She then shared how “sensitive and proud" she is of herself for "shutting all that down.”

As OK! previously reported, the "Baby One More Time" singer spent years seeking an end to the conservatorship that began in February 2008 amid her highly publicized personal struggles.

During a June 2021 court hearing before Judge Brenda Penny, Britney described the arrangement as deeply traumatic and made an emotional plea for her freedom.

“I just want my life back,” she added, explaining she wanted to end the "abusive" conservatorship "without having to be evaluated."

Britney continued by describing how long she had lived under the arrangement and why she believed it needed to end.

"And it's been 13 years. And it's enough. It's been a long time since I've owned my money. And it's my wish and my dream for all of this to end without being tested," she continued in her 24-minute statement. "Again, it makes no sense whatsoever for the state of California to sit back and literally watch me with their own two eyes, make a living for so many people, and pay so many people, trucks and buses on the road with me and be told, I'm not good enough. But I'm great at what I do. And I allow these people to control what I do, ma'am. And it's enough. It makes no sense at all."

The mom-of-two offered additional insight about her conservatorship in her 2023 memoir, The Woman in Me.

According to her, the program "stripped me of my womanhood, made me into a child."

"I became more of an entity than a person onstage. I had always felt music in my bones and my blood; they stole that from me," she continued.