Nicole Kidman, 57, Wakes Up 'Crying and Gasping' When Thinking About Her 'Mortality' and Marriage to Keith Urban: 'It's Definitely a Journey'

Nicole Kidman is emotional about getting older.

The A-lister, 57, opened up about how often she's haunted by thoughts of her own "mortality" more so than when she was in her younger years.

"Mortality. Connection. Life coming and hitting you," Kidman, who wed Keith Urban in 2006, explained in a recent interview when talking about how in touch she is with herself. "And loss of parents and raising children and marriage and all of the things that go into making you a fully sentient human. I'm in all of those places. So life is, whew."

"It's definitely a journey. And it hits you as you get older how it's a wake up at 3 a.m. crying and gasping kind of thing," she continued. "If you're in it and not numbing yourself to it. And I'm in it. Fully in it."

The Big Little Lies alum emphasized how being a mother to daughters Sunday Rose, 16, and Faith, 14, whom she shares with the country star, 57, and her adopted kids, Bella, 31, and Connor, 29, with ex-husband Tom Cruise, has made her extremely aware of her time on earth. "There's the mortality aspect of life which, when you start to deal with that, it's very heavy. When you're raising children you're like, 'I got to stay here. I want to see all of this.' It's devastating and beautiful and extraordinary," she noted.

Kidman recently endured a tragic loss when her mother, Janelle Kidman, passed away in September. "My sister and I along with our family want to thank you for the outpouring of love and kindness we have felt this week. Every message we have received from those who loved and admired our Mother has meant more to us than we will ever be able to express. Thank you from our whole family for respecting our privacy as we take care of each other ❤️," the Oscar winner announced on social media at the time.

Luckily, her devoted spouse has been by her side. "I met him later in life and it's been the best thing that's ever happened to me," Kidman told Gayle King in a 2022 interview. "That man is the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Urban has equally gushed over his other half. "She's just the one," the guitarist said during a 2020 appearance on the "Armchair Expert" podcast. "She's the one that I was searching for my whole life, and everything not only changed but had to change in me if I was going to go that road."

British GQ conducted the interview with Kidman.