"I really believed that this was my guy. I thought, 'Oh my god, I won.' Like I got everything. I have my career, I have respect, I have my family, I have so many friends, I have all of these things. And then I thought this was gonna be the person I spend my life with," the 47-year-old star dished about her initial feelings toward Koy.
"I'm not that hard up to get married, but I was open to the idea of it, and we definitely discussed it at length because it was important to him," Handler — who has yet to tie the knot with any of her previous boyfriends — explained. "And then, towards the end of the relationship, it just became clear that this was not my person."
"There were just some behaviors that we couldn't agree on … It felt to me like I would have to abandon myself, which maybe I would have been OK to do if I were 20 or 25, but I wasn't willing to do that. No matter how much I loved this person — and I loved him so much — I was not going to abandon myself," the Chelsea Lately alum confessed.
Handler, who parted ways with the Koy in July, continued: "I am not going to change the way that I behave in order to make you feel more comfortable. I'm not doing that, and I had to walk away from something that I really believed was gonna be a forever relationship. So that was difficult."
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"I was in a lot of pain, but it was unacceptable. I said this can't happen. Our relationship just devolved, and we both could not agree on a situation or several situations, and I thought therapy could help — it did not — and I exhausted any avenue I could think of, and then I just realized this is futile," the television personality expressed of her immense heartbreak.
Handler — who was introduced to Koy by a mutual friend nearly 20 years ago — admitted, "Walking away from him was one of the most difficult things that I have ever had to do."
As for what the comedic duo is up to now, Handler revealed she hasn't spoken to her ex-boyfriend in quite a while.
"There has to be some accountability ... from him about what happened because it was just ridiculous, and I don't think we can have a friendship until there's some accountability and some responsibility taken," she explained.
"We had a really great friendship, and I would love to have that again, you know, but without a couple steps in the right direction, I don't see that happening," Handler concluded.