Elle Macpherson Unveils Alcohol Addiction in New Memoir: 'I Was in a Horrible Downward Spiral'

“My life looked amazing to everybody. On the outside, I was doing a beautiful job, but deep down inside, I was really struggling,” she wrote in her book. “I would go out and drink, party and become sick again. It became a constant repeat: I was in a horrible downward spiral.”

Her addiction began in 2003 after the birth of her second son, Cy, when she was gifted a bottle of champagne as a congratulatory gift while staying at a facility in London.

Despite her naturopaths cautioning her about the hormonal effects of drinking alcohol so soon after childbirth, she couldn’t resist the temptation.

As a result, once the model was left alone with her newborn baby, her attention became fixated on the "bottle of champagne in the ice bucket."

Macpherson, who was nicknamed “The Body” for her athletic figure, rose to fame in the '80s and '90s, gracing the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue a whopping five times.

At the time, she was juggling motherhood and her relationship with French financier Arpad “Arki” Busson, with whom she shares two children: Flynn and Cy.

Life as a new mom wasn’t easy for the Sirens alum.

Her firstborn suffered from serious health issues, while Busson was frequently away for work, leading Macpherson to turn to alcohol.

“In the evenings, after I put him to bed, I’d find myself relaxing with a vodka,” she recalled in an Alcoholics Anonymous support group meeting, referring to her son.

Despite considering rehab around that time, Busson reassured her she didn’t need help.

“I think he was afraid of me being away or of change,” she reflected.

The addiction became a nightly routine as it was fueled by anxiety and a desire to maintain a perfect image.

“Often, I would drink after I put my children to bed. I’d sit by myself, have shots of vodka, write to-do lists, clean the house, and listen to music until I passed out,” she shared. “I’d wake up, run six miles, and have coffee for breakfast.”

The mother-of-two became good at masking her feelings.

“People would tell me I was so organized. I was really proud of that. I guess I had to be organized because I was drinking and I never wanted anyone to know,” she wrote. “So I made sure the house was clean and tidy; I made sure I looked great and I made sure the children were perfect.”

Despite her polished exterior, her struggles weren’t hidden from everyone. Her naturopaths warned her about the harm she was causing herself, while her therapist suggested rehab.

“I hurriedly poured myself a shot … I remember thinking, I love this feeling. I’d missed it so much,” she confessed.

But after three drinks, she experienced a moment of clarity. Overcame with anger at herself, she poured out the vodka and left Ibiza, returning to London alone.

Eventually, Macpherson entered rehab in Arizona, where she faced all her issues beyond alcohol. She was grouped with individuals battling eating disorders, which led her to confront her struggles with food and body image as well.