Madison Brown Admits She's Been 'Holding Onto a Lot of Anger' Following Late Brother Garrison's Tragic Death

Madison Brown Brush admitted she's been struggling with complicated emotions a month and a half after her late brother Garrison died by suicide.

On Wednesday, April 17, the mother-of-three — who shares son Axel and daughters Evie and Josephine with husband Caleb Brush — took to Instagram to reflect on anger and gratefulness.

"This past November, I embarked on a month-long journey of gratitude, driven by my curiosity about its profound effects on our well-being," she began. "The insights I gained were nothing short of astounding, revealing how a simple practice could significantly alter our emotional landscape."

"Lately, I’ve been holding onto a lot of anger, feeling it gnaw at me day after day," she continued. "It’s becoming a heavy load to carry, and I’m starting to feel ready for a change."

She confessed she wasn't ready to "commit" to another full month of "focused gratitude" or to "let go" of her anger just yet, but she wanted to feel better on a daily basis.

"I am ready to wake up without that immediate sense of irritation and to not let anger color my entire day," she explained. "It seems that cultivating a softer heart could be the first step."

"This journey seems to be filled with both shadows and light," she noted. "The absence of what was once familiar is profoundly painful, yet the gratitude for the moments we shared is overwhelmingly powerful."

"I know that it’s perfectly okay to find small moments of gratitude amidst the pain," she said. "Embracing gratitude doesn’t mean ignoring our hurts; I think it means allowing ourselves to appreciate the full breadth of our experiences, the bitter and the sweet."

Followers flooded the comments section with words of love and support for the mourning reality star.

"Grief is so full of powerful emotions. And we have to feel it to heal it. Praying for you as you navigate all of this. Truly I am," one user penned.

A second shared, "Anger is part of the grief process. Give yourself grace to work through it at your own pace. There is no 'set' time for any part of the grief process."

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As OK! previously reported, Maddie's brother Garrison was confirmed dead on Tuesday, March 5, after his body was found in the bedroom of his Flagstaff, Ariz., home by their younger sibling Gabriel.

Garrison was only 25 years old.

Police found no evidence of foul play and quickly ruled his death a suicide by self-inflicted gunshot wound. Their report noted that both Gabriel and Garrison's roommates noted he'd been struggling with drinking and depression prior to his death.